I don't know.

Right now, I'm a twenty year old college kid. I listen to "Papa, can you hear me?" from Yentl on repeat sometimes. I eat Yakisoba microwaveable "Japanese" noodles for dinner some nights, even though I know full well that they're riddled with MSG and other toxins. I paint with no real knowledge or skill, really I'm just pushing and mixing colors around until something I like happens. Most Tuesdays and Thursdays, the days I don't have any classes except for online work, I stay in bed until somewhere around two in the afternoon. I'm a little ashamed to admit that, but it's true. I Spark Notes a lot of the required literature I'm supposed to read for my classes because it's boring (I know, I'm a bad, bad English major...). I still wear sets of colorful bangles on my wrists because I like to make music when I walk, just like when I was sixteen. I have no idea what the future holds. I have no idea what kind of job I'm going to have or what my life is going to look like.
Right now, I'm engaged to the nerdy, whimsical, sarcastic man I've always dreamed about. We'll be married in a month and twenty days and I'll move into his tiny studio apartment. It's an old place, but it's well taken care of and full of character and I can't wait to make it our home. A professor of mine just remarked yesterday that it makes him nervous when people get married in their early twenties because people change so much over time. I agree that people change. I think something's wrong with a person if they continue to stay the exact same way and think the exact same things throughout the course of their entire life. We're supposed to change and grow, it's a part of living! But I also have to disagree with my professor. Because, yes, while people who marry young change as time goes by, that's no less true for people who marry in their thirties or forties. You never stop molding and discovering new things about yourself and the world around you. We are, to use a dirty word, constantly evolving. But does that mean that if I marry someone when I'm twenty, I'm going to outgrow them by the time that I'm forty? No. I don't think so. I think people who say they "outgrew" or "no longer fit" their spouse just stopped loving them or never loved them correctly, in most cases. I think that a marriage is something that is also constantly growing and evolving, and it takes work to keep it strong. Duh. Captain Obvious much, Sarah? But anyway. I don't even know why I'm saying all this. I guess it's just that what my professor said got me thinking. And since I almost never speak up in his class, I suppose I'm just responding to him on here. Sam and I are marrying young, at least for our society's standards. I'm 20 (and will still be 20 when we marry) and he just turned 22 a few days ago. But I'm not worried about us. I'm slightly annoyed by all the people who feel the need to tell me they think I'm making a mistake (which actually isn't that many people, but still. Sigh.). We have a relationship that was built on a very strong friendship. When we started, well, being a thing (I'm uncomfortable with terms like courting or dating..I don't know why.), I was confident in the knowledge that Sam knew me better than anyone, and likewise. As friends, we just had this weird, beautiful, soul-y kind of connection where each understood the other perfectly, effortlessly, like reading each other's minds/finishing each other's sentences/all that lame, sappy stuff couples in movies do that doesn't really happen in real life. Sam and I knew each other. We trusted each other completely. We could tell each other anything. We knew what we were getting. Sam has seen me at some of my worst and darkest moments, and he still wants to be by my side through every minute of this life. I guess, again, I say all this to say that I know we're going to be okay. Now, when we're kids in our twenties crammed into a tiny apartment and finishing up our degrees, and later on down the road. Why? Because what we have, through all of life's changes and different seasons, will always be worth fighting for. It will always be worth cherishing and nurturing.
Yes, right now I'm a twenty year old kid that sometimes wears knit berets and beat up skate shoes. I still feel awkward when I go to the grocery store because I feel like everyone can tell I have no clue what I'm doing. Heck, I feel awkward in about 86% of my daily life situations. But that's the thing about life. You keep changing. I will always be me, but I'll be different too. I have no idea what 25 year old Sarah looks like. Or 28 year old. Or 35 year old. All I know is what I hope for her to be, and that is that she likes herself. If she likes herself, then that'll mean that everything else has worked out, too.
Though, also, it would be really cool to be a published writer. And have kids, maybe even adopt some from Iran, Vietnam, Fill in the blank.